When it comes to the education of your children, many parents discuss options. Public school, Private school, Home school... the choices can be overwhelming. For most, public school is what we rely on. We were the same. Our oldest spent most of his school years in public school, and our younger children began their education journey there. Public school has its place, and its purpose, and we do not hate on public school, don't get us wrong. The fact that we made the decision to educate our children at home was a result of many different factors.
First and foremost for us, was time. When we worked regular jobs, sending our kids to public school was what we had to do. We certainly could not afford private school, and we needed two incomes to make ends meet, so public school filled a need. Most people fall into this category. We know our kids need an education, and thankfully, public school is available to do what it can to prepare our children for the future.
However, public school is not ideal. The teachers and administrators of public institutions must cater to the needs of the many, and unfortunately, some children slip through the cracks. Children, just like adults, have different learning styles and needs. Children also do not mature at the same rate and are not necessarily ready for aspects of learning according to an average time table set by the school. Public school cannot be flexible enough to give each child individual attention to be sure that they are meeting and exceeding their capabilities. That each child is challenged or rewarded according to their individual selves. Not even a private school education can do that.
It is very hard for two working parents to balance both their jobs, their homes, their children's schedules, homework, school functions... It can literally drive you crazy. Sacrifices must be made. Someone has to be sure the kids get on the bus or get dropped off at school, this can make a parent late for work, or impact their work availability. Someone has to be sure the kids are met at home, or have a daycare to attend; more costs are incurred as work is lost or more hours are required to pay the daycare or sitter. Homework must be done; children are already exhausted, and the homework pile only grows more and more. Parents often do not understand what their children are being asked to do, confusion and frustration mounts. Conferences are called to get teachers and parents on the same page, hard to coordinate with work schedules, communication suffers. I cannot tell you how many missed conferences, awards ceremonies, school functions, fundraisers, etc. that we had to miss because we could not afford to miss work, or our jobs would not allow us the time off.
When we began our farm, time became even more important. We were lucky to have my mother-in-law available and willing to pick up many of the duties when it came to getting the kids from school, helping with homework, making dinner, whatever needed to be done; while my husband gave up his job to take on the responsibility of making this farm happen. I had to work outside the home to pay the bills, we had not much time to focus on what our kids were doing in school, try as we might to be available for questions, coaching. It was tiring and frustrating for us all!
Our oldest was in high school, he seemed to have lost all caring about his education; not doing homework, getting poor grades... all despite being very bright. Our middle child was extremely bright and found school to be very little challenge. He did the work, but was becoming very withdrawn. He did not enjoy his classmates, thinking they were not as focused on learning as he was and merely distractions. Our youngest was struggling to keep up with the daily schedule. He needs more time to process and retain what he learns, and we could see him falling behind. He was saddened and frustrated, thinking he was stupid, when we all knew he wasn't. Public school was failing us, and we felt that we were failing our children, but what could we do?
I have always taken extra time to incorporate learning opportunities throughout our daily lives. We made visiting the library a weekly trip, we enjoyed zoos and museums when we had time, we did fun experiments and projects at home. When the boys were on vacation, I gave them workbooks and activities to keep their minds sharp. I reasoned, weren't we already homeschooling? Certainly, if we had some guidelines to follow, they could learn just as well at home as they were in school, and they could do it at their own pace. So I started researching, and we began talking... with my husband at home working to make the farm function and profitable, my mother-in-law there to supervise, me to follow up, we could do this, right?
What we discovered was a much broader world of homeschooling than we had ever thought. State requirements vary, but our state was very homeschooler friendly. We reached out to friends and found many who were already doing what we were considering, and their children were successful. We talked homeschool associations, curriculum, reporting. I was starting to get the picture, and starting to believe that even with our time constraints, homeschooling was going to work for us. I read up on methods, from unschooling to structured curricula. I started to formulate a plan.
Then there was the question that everyone who considers homeschooling runs into... what about Socialization? Don't homeschooled children all end up being those creepy weirdo types that have trouble interacting with people and suffer in the long run for it? Well, that was not our experience when we met other homeschoolers. Most were articulate, outgoing, goal-oriented, free-thinking, interesting individuals. Just what we were looking for our children to be! Besides, when I thought about the 'socializing' that the boys had been doing so far, I had to question what people thought socialization really was. When placed in a room with a group of people all from the same geographic region, all the same age, and then told they aren't allowed to speak except at prescribed times (but not too loudly), what socialization is happening? When children begin to separate into cliques and bullies intimidate, teachers don't observe everything, what lessons about society are being taught? Instead, if our children went with us, they would learn to interact with people from varying backgrounds, of varying ages, with varying skills and interests, how broad would their world be then? Kids are everywhere, and my children find them, even without school. On playgrounds, at the store, at the library, at others' homes... their social opportunities are endless.
Once fortified with knowledge about how to proceed, willing to find the time, and with courage in spades, we made the leap to homeschooling, and have never looked back. It has become one of the most profound and fulfilling things that we have ever done, and we can see the change and influence it has had on our children, in the most positive of ways. We have our trials and tribulations with it every day, but who doesn't? We set goals, we meet them and then exceed them, and we keep growing and learning together.
So if you are reading this, and are on the fence about homeschooling, know that you are not alone. We were once right there beside you, and we had all the same concerns, doubts, fears, hopes, and dreams that you do. Believe me when I say, if we can do it, so can you. It is a serious commitment, and not a decision to be made lightly. If you find that you just can't, that's okay too. I hope that you will find something here to enrich your life with your children, and realize that school and learning doesn't have to happen in a particular environment or place. It happens everywhere, all the time, if you are just willing to look around!
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